Idiot homeowners
ahem.
There once was a man with a gut,
Who drank himself into a rut,
Yes vodka and ice,
were his number one vice,
But fat made up much of his butt.
Ok, so for everyone who doesn't know (gosh I hope this gets popular so that comment actually applies), I am a kitchen designer. I design kitchens and cabinetry to fit with certain kitchens, cabinetry colors, and even countertops and flooring to go with the cabinets. That's right, I can do colors, and I'm not gay. (Don't even think about posting a comment, I can read your mind) What I hate is when a homeowner comes in and says something like this, "I need a price on a granite countertop." My first response is, ok, how big is it? Or, do you have a drawing of it? Unfortunately, most don't, so they say no. Then they proceed to tell me how their kitchen is laid out, and using their arms wide open, show me how big the countertop is. Oh yeah, I'll get right on it lady. I know these people aren't used to doing this, but come on, use some common sense. Then, her husband is walking around the showroom, big gut hanging out, sipping on a pepsi he bought next door at the liquor store. (You want to make work more interesting, work next door to a liquore store. That rhymed) So he's walking around, stops in front of something, burps, scratches his protruding belly, and keeps walking as his wife again tries to show me how big the countertop is with her arms. Brilliant.
Over the past few years, I have rapidly begun to lose faith in the intelligence of the human race. No, I haven't been watching Jerry Springer much, I've just been around too many people. I've come to the conclusion that a lot of people are just plain ol' dumb. No offense intended, it's just how it is. Those are the facts Jack. Now you, reading this, you're saying to yourself, "Yeah, a lot of people really are, but I'm not." I won't contest it cause I don't know you, but if you ever come into the showroom with your arms open (not for a hug) looking for a countertop price, you're walking out with a fancy new name tag. (And if you can't figure out what that name tag would probably say, yes, you are dumb.)
There once was a man with a gut,
Who drank himself into a rut,
Yes vodka and ice,
were his number one vice,
But fat made up much of his butt.
Ok, so for everyone who doesn't know (gosh I hope this gets popular so that comment actually applies), I am a kitchen designer. I design kitchens and cabinetry to fit with certain kitchens, cabinetry colors, and even countertops and flooring to go with the cabinets. That's right, I can do colors, and I'm not gay. (Don't even think about posting a comment, I can read your mind) What I hate is when a homeowner comes in and says something like this, "I need a price on a granite countertop." My first response is, ok, how big is it? Or, do you have a drawing of it? Unfortunately, most don't, so they say no. Then they proceed to tell me how their kitchen is laid out, and using their arms wide open, show me how big the countertop is. Oh yeah, I'll get right on it lady. I know these people aren't used to doing this, but come on, use some common sense. Then, her husband is walking around the showroom, big gut hanging out, sipping on a pepsi he bought next door at the liquor store. (You want to make work more interesting, work next door to a liquore store. That rhymed) So he's walking around, stops in front of something, burps, scratches his protruding belly, and keeps walking as his wife again tries to show me how big the countertop is with her arms. Brilliant.
Over the past few years, I have rapidly begun to lose faith in the intelligence of the human race. No, I haven't been watching Jerry Springer much, I've just been around too many people. I've come to the conclusion that a lot of people are just plain ol' dumb. No offense intended, it's just how it is. Those are the facts Jack. Now you, reading this, you're saying to yourself, "Yeah, a lot of people really are, but I'm not." I won't contest it cause I don't know you, but if you ever come into the showroom with your arms open (not for a hug) looking for a countertop price, you're walking out with a fancy new name tag. (And if you can't figure out what that name tag would probably say, yes, you are dumb.)
posted by The D at
2:37 PM
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