Spank the Diet, The Villain and Rodrigo

My diet came up to me and said, "You don't scare me boy." So I smacked it in the face and told it to step off! On the bad side, this diet is making me crazy.
Ok, but seriously, I stuck to it, and there were a couple times that I was a little antsy to snack on something, but I did it, and I went and worked out for an hour, and I feel good today.
The slightly disturbing part is that I barely ate 1000 calories. I didn't mean to eat that few, but when I added them up at the end of the day, and then subtracted the 200 cals from running, it was barely at 1000. From what I've heard, yeah, that's no good. Anyway.
I'm going to start a new segment on my blog starting Monday morning. Every week I'm going to do this segment, and if it actually gets popular, I may do it more than once a week. I'm not going to tell you now, you'll just have to come back on Monday to see. (Feel free to come back many more times before then and leave lots of comments though.)
Recently, I watched the movie "Bad Boys II". Now, I had never seen the first one, so I didn't really know what I was in for. It was WAY too long, and the car chase scenes were way overdone and completely, utterly unrealistic. But this is the most annoying part, and it's a standard in all action movies. The villain boss. When the villain boss is younger, just aspiring to be a fiend, and faithfully attending all his scoundrelish (it's a word now) classes, he eventually has a meeting with a left hand man. (See, if they're good, they're a right hand man. But this one is evil, therefore a left hand man. I know this stuff) Here's the conversation. V for Villain, L for left hand man.

V - "Rodrigo! (that's his name now) We need to talk!"
L - "Yes boss. What can I do?"
V - "I need some men Rodrigo." He now puts his hand on Rodrigo's shoulder, intending to talk closer so no one else will hear. Why? I don't know, they're at a villain college. (Yeah, it's a college now. You want some of this? I'm on a diet baby!)
L - "Of course boss, I will go to the shooting range and find the best marksmen I..."
V - "No! Rodrigo! You idiot!" He slaps Rodrigo on the back of the head and points at him. "You go and find me the people who graduate last. I want incompetence you fool!"
L - "But boss, shouldn't we get capable peons at least?"
V - "Do you dare contradict me Rodrigo?!"
Rodrigo cowers, anticipating another savage bitch slap to the back of the head.
L - "No boss, no, of course not. But you've seen the movies boss, if we get people like that, the good guys will win, and that's so annoying."
V - Is now seething and spit is seeping through his tightened lips. He pulls Rodrigo close.
L - "Boss, did you just have guacamole?"
V - "LISTEN HERE RODRIGO. (Caps makes it look forceful) YOU GO FIND THE STUPIDEST, MOST INCOMPETENT AND UNCOORDINATED OAFS YOU CAN FIND."
L - Trembling. "Yes boss."
V - "And if they're blind? Even better!" Insert evil laugh here.

End Scene.
Yes, I know I deserve an Oscar, but I try to remain humble. See, that conversation always happens, and that's why so many action movies SUCK. (I really didn't have much to write today)

OH, READ THIS. I do write movies though, and am currently writing one. One of the bigger characters has a song that she whistles or hums quite often and that's how the main character recognizes her. It's a pretty important part, and I can't think of a good song. In the story, it's a song that her mother used to sing to her before bedtime. (Her mother's not around anymore) SO, leave comments with suggestions on songs I could use. If someone gives a good one and I use it, I will write your name somewhere into the script, so leave your FULL NAME too. (Somehow I'm going to break 10 comments one of these days and I'll feel special.)